Bertha knows a cover up when she sees it, has even participated in a few. The incident with the bleach bottle and the senator’s grandson? Yeah, She felt sorry for the little guy and chose to give him the benefit of the doubt. But we know there are others who have also had to do this on job questionnaires. Bertha responded to a few.
What was her last job? Bertha was a reporter.
Does she have any strange proclivities? Define Strange.
Is she a whistleblower? Ya mean will she blow the whistle on those who are into shagging produce?
Does she have any skills? Define skills. Bertha knows how to flaunt em like the best, studied Mata Hari for ideas.
Would she out any candidate who was into weird things? Of course, especially if they refused to answer questions about their affairs, mistresses, romps with produce, the bleach bottle, mop.
Yeah, the old girl could do a tell all about people she has known, incidents she witnessed, women who came crying to her about their senator boyfriends. But there is a difference. She won’t just randomly out anyone unless they have black mailed her. Then the claws come out, the red gloves go on, and she goes into full Bertha mode. Then its on. This is why she hates people who lie, tell stupid lies and then call it fake news. Donald, your toupee needs work.
She applauds guys like Assange, Snowdon who have taken truth-telling to new heights. And of course she is gaga over George Clooney. She applauds Marshall Mathers as well. That boy knows how to make her smile. But its Puppy who really knows how to get liars to confess. He dangles produce before the unwitting party and before you know it, the poor sap is moaning and groaning. Puppy pulls out his squash, some melons and the sap is just begging to shag them. He even has witnessed the senator who insisted he be given a crudité platter before session. Funny how nobody got to sample his goods. Come on, we know who was romping those carrots.
So how should she approach Donald? Produce is a possibility, and we know he likes it rough and tough, so bovines are in the offing. He can’t resist melons, and groping is in his line of women. Kelly Anne and Michelle could be his next victims. Going full frontal is out as he won’t grope anything that is transgender, but perhaps Bertha can pull it out and off. Yeah, we went there. Donald, you don’t drink, but who said it can’t be placed in pastry? Bertha plans to get to the bottom of his lies.
That rogue senator can tell you that dame could get a dog to talk. Puppy is giving the evil eye. No puppy, not you. We are referring to his Irish Setter, the one who gets confused with his wife. Puppy offered her a carrot and oy the language that came out of her mouth. Harvey, we did that one for you. A darkened wine cellar, a carrot, sound familiar Donald? Er we mean Harv?
Yes, Bertha hates those who cover up, even though there are times things happen and ya need to. But she won’ t let him off the hook on the death of military. No way. If it takes lambscaping after dark, melons, carrots, she will use what is needed to get that donkey to screech. From there she will feed it to Julien, and well, you get the picture. Make no mistake, if it comes to uncovering the obvious, Bertha is on it, behind it, using it, riding it, oops, did we go too far?